THE FIVE LOVE LANGUAGES ARE: 1) Words of Affirmation – covered in my blog here! 2) Quality Time – covered in my blog here! 3) Receiving Gifts 4) Acts of Service 5) Physical Touch
If these 5 love languages are new to you, don’t worry! First, I encourage you and your partner to discover your own love languages by taking the quiz here: https://www.5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/
After that, stay tuned! Over the next few months, I will be doing a blog to highlight one of the 5 love languages with tips on how to apply it to your relationship.
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We’re halfway through the Love Languages series! In today’s blog, I will discuss the third love language – giving and receiving Gifts. I can imagine some of you are grinning with excitement because you absolutely love gifts, while the rest of you could take it or leave it. For the former, this may be because giving and receiving gifts was the primary way your family demonstrated love and appreciation when you were growing up. On the other side of that, the latter group may have had that same love and appreciation shown in different ways, so gifts aren’t as meaningful.
Conflict and resentment can grow when one only shows love through his/her own Love Language. For example – while one partner may be trying to show their partner love by giving a gift after a big argument, the other partner may take it as an attempt to “buy back forgiveness” and reject the gift. Very quickly, a seemingly nice gesture on one end can be met with great resistance. On the other side of that, it can also be taken personally when one partner wants thoughtful gifts but giving gifts is just not in his/her partner’s nature. I encourage you to initiate a conversation about what gifts mean to you and your partner because you each have your own perceptions of it, both positive and negative.
Below are some gift ideas.
Stay One Step Ahead
Keep a running list of potential gifts ideas on your phone. If your partner mentions anything they want or is thinking of buying, add it to the list. This serves as a gift idea bank to pull from when the opportunity arises.
Make It Rain Tickets
Be on the lookout for concerts, sports games, festivals, or any sort of event that your partner would be interested in. Then surprise them with a ticket!
These ideas sound great, but I know what you’re thinking: “I would love to do this, but I’m not made of money!” Naturally, there can be concerns with gift giving. Here are some ideas on how you can give gifts that are affordable, but just as meaningful.
Remember the Little Things
When you’re out running errands, pick up your partner’s favorite beverage, treat, or snack. Maybe even consider picking some flowers on the way home. These little gifts are unlikely to cost much and it is something you can do daily and/or weekly to demonstrate you were thinking about your partner.
Made with Love
If you’re creative and crafty, try making gifts. To commemorate my husband and I’s first football game, I once bought a cheap, unfinished wooden picture frame from Hobby Lobby, painted it and decorated it with Texans memorabilia, and finished it with adding a picture of us from the game. He loved it! Making gifts can be a good way to save money, but it also shows your partner you took extra time to do something special.
Bring Home a Special Souvenir
When traveling for work, a small souvenir can go a long way to show your partner they were on your mind. They will surely appreciate that you made the effort to pick them up a little something.
Whether gift-giving is your Love Language or your partner’s, I hope this blog was helpful in providing some ideas. This particular Love Language can be a stressful one for some, whether it is due to financial constraints or not knowing what kind of gifts to give. Remember: while getting big, shiny gifts is definitely nice, small thoughtful mementos also go a long way.
As my 5 Love Languages blog series continues, keep a lookout for which language “speaks” to you and contains what you need to feel connected and loved!
Reach out to Amy Wine Counseling Center at 832-421-8714 if you have questions about our therapeutic services or would like to schedule an appointment.
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