I want to start this blog post with a simple and yet powerful question – Who are you?
I’m not asking about your name, where you’re from, or what you do. I’m asking about all
the little pieces that make up who you are. What do you truly value? What aspects of your
identity are important to you? How do you react to your own strong emotions? What
triggers them? What are your strengths and weaknesses? Do you let others see/know you
as you truly are or do you fear rejection? What are your thoughts and beliefs about the
meaning of life and how do they influence your day-to-day actions? What are you truly
passionate about? What are your goals and aspirations? How do you define
healthy/unhealthy relationships? How do you nurture your relationships? How do others
typically affect you? How do you handle frustrations and setbacks? How do you celebrate
your victories? How do you describe yourself? How did you come to be this way and to
believe the things you believe in?
Although this list of questions is long, it is only a small part of exploring who you are. We
are complex beings and there is so much that goes into making up who we are. Perhaps
you’ve thought about some of these questions, perhaps you haven’t, or it’s been so long
since you thought about them that you have changed enough that the old answers no
longer fit.
Discovering (or rediscovering) yourself is a big part of therapy. Exploring not only who you
are right now but also how you came to be this way and who you want to be is all part of the
process. Having this type of self-knowledge is a great tool in understanding your emotional
triggers and behavioral patterns. Knowing yourself and your history is the first step to
accepting yourself and learning to live authentically. Exploring and understanding your
past allows you to heal from past wounds and change unhelpful or harmful cycles.
Knowing yourself can be a game-changer in your relationships as well. It can help you to
keep your triggers in check, define and set healthy boundaries, be more understanding of
differences, and to communicate with more openness and less defensiveness.
Last (but not least), exploring who you are sets you on a path of continuous growth and
self-reflection. We are always changing and evolving, and different situations and
relationships can bring up different parts of us that weren’t known before. When we take
the time to explore and get to know ourselves, we can learn to better anticipate our own
needs and preferences, and we can take steps to support and care for ourselves.
I want to encourage you to take some time to think (and maybe even journal) about those
questions on the first paragraph. After you come up with some answers it’s time for new
questions - Did you find out something new? Are there any questions that are difficult to
think about? What other questions do you think are important for you to explore who you
are? Is there anything you haven’t accepted about yourself? Are there things you would like
to change?
As you can see, self-knowledge is the first step needed to fully embrace who you are, and
to change those things that are keeping you stuck and making it harder for you to grow.
Give yourself some weekly time for self-discovery. You are worth it.
Barbara Johns, LPC Associate
I believe that in order to heal, people need to have a safe space where they can explore what is contributing to their problems and how they can use their difficulties as fuel for personal growth in order to turn things around and live life the way they really want to. My goal is to provide you with that safe and supportive environment as well as with new tools and skills that you can take with you on your journey toward healing and growth.
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